All of these “promposals” as people are calling them, are giving me some flashbacks. Flashbacks of not going to prom.
You see, my school didn’t have a prom, because I went to an alternative high school. My former high school however did, and I couldn’t get my now husband to pick up the cues that I wanted to go. I would say things like “its too bad that my school doesn’t have a prom” and “prom sounds like so much fun, I really want to go, but my school never had one” and the totally not clear “hey, we should go to your prom, it would be so fun!”
I completely understand why he missed the hints and didn’t take me to prom, after being married for almost two years and dating for five I know now that I should have said “take me to your prom, i want to go, you don’t have an option in this!” and it would have been done. I imagine it would have been awful though, because I hate crowds and everyone at prom was younger than me so I wouldn’t know anyone there. He took a year longer to graduate than I did because he wanted to go into the marines and couldn’t with a tier two high school diploma, which is what he would have had if he graduated from the same school I did.
It got me thinking though, I should have done a “promposal” to make him say yes to take me to prom. The ultimate romantic high school gesture, for two people that were “just friends” it would have been spectacular..hilarious even.
Im not one of those people that looks back and regrets not going to prom, although I had the desire to go. I don’t really care or feel like i missed out on an experience that everyone in high school has, and I didn’t have to spend an insane amount of money on a high school dance. Did you go to prom? Did you miss out? Do you care?
Im stressed, there are issues with buying my house, and packing sucks and I am stressed. I have spent two days trying to make progress on my house and I’m getting nowhere and its driving me nuts! My nephew and I play this game I call the happy game where I make him name three things that make him happy until he’s not angry or sad anymore. My stress and anxiety are preventing me from doing anything, so I think that I need to play the happy game. I’m only thinking about things that make me happy until I actually feel happy.
Three things that make me happy:
Spring makes me feel happy! Something about the grass greening up from the dead yellow, and flowers beginning to bloom makes everything seem a little more right in the world. Maybe its also because i was born in the summer and i came into the world when it was warm and bright. Spring is a very calming season for me.
I am the kind of person that opens the windows during a storm so I can hear the rain pour and thunder crash. I secretly hope the power goes out for a few hours just so I can light the dark room with candles and enjoy the silence that it brings when theres no electricity humming in the background. It brings a sense of comfort to me knowing that all I have to worry about is the moment I am in. I don’t have to find something to occupy my time like finding a movie or show on netflix.
The last time the power went out I only had tea light candles and nothing to put them in, so I got creative. Wine glasses work perfectly, and they also make it easy to carry them with you room to room. I am not a fan of unattended candles, house fires are my literal nightmare, so figuring that out was the best life hack I have ever uncovered.
I might love animals a little too much. When animals do cute things, sometimes I cry. When I have a bad dream or I’m too sad to function, I watch videos of baby otters. Puppies can be used as a negotiating tactic for me, and 99% of the time it works. Not even offering to get me a puppy, offering to let me pet or look at puppies is good enough. I have a hard time when it comes to going to an animal shelter because I want to take them all home and make them my best friends. If I could I would have a aviary sanctuary in my home. I still remember what its like to be bit by a small parrot, and I’m willing to risk that just to have a dozen happy birds living with me.
This was the happy game, slightly altered to my writing needs. If you feel sad or angry, or are just bored, I suggest giving it a try. Right now i feel better, and I know the stress will come creeping back, because my brain is an asshole, but for now I know I can breathe.